Last month, we began the first module in our Kundalini Teacher Training course, and what a week-end it was! Bright lights from all over the United States and Newfoundland, Canada (!!!!) came together at Indigo Pilates & Yoga in Pleasant Hill, CA to partake in this incredible course. I came into class on the first day excited beyond measure that one of the biggest dreams I've held closest to my heart for a long time, was now manifest. I felt like I was vibrating like a live wire with anticipation and just sheer joy that I was finally going to be sitting in a teacher training course with my mentors, Ravi Singh and Ana Brett.
From the moment we tuned in together at the beginning of class, I knew without a doubt that this group was special. Not just special, actually. More like "we are going to come together and do some life-changing, phenomenal, soul-shaking work" special. Our class is comprised of some exceptionally beautiful souls, I have to say. We have folks from all walks of life. And the common thread we all seem to share is that we want to make a profound difference not only in ourselves, but for those whose lives we touch. To me, this class was like watching a fireworks display...for three days straight. It was intense, inexplicably beautiful and just simply magical.
"There is only one thing you should know. Conquer yourself." ~ Yogi Bhajan
For the entire month since the first class, I've been getting to know myself in a completely different way. My body was completely exhausted for three weeks after the training class. I could only manage a handful of classes, and I slept so much. I was definitely experiencing a healing crisis. I also noticed many old emotional hurts (even ones I thought I had processed through already) were coming to the surface. I cried, I slept and I ate. And more than once, I wondered what in Hell I had really gotten myself into. Was I really ready to release and process on this deep of a level? My body answered with a resounding "YES!!!!"
Through all of the intensity, one beautiful thing became manifest, and that was being able to experience the emotional component of the healing crisis in a more compassionately detached manner. I allowed myself to feel the feelings that would come up and let them flow through me, realizing they were letting me know they were ready to be healed. I didn't get caught up in the story like I usually do. There were times where the processing was so intense that I really felt like I was on sensory overload. It was during those times that I became very gentle with myself, allowing the wisdom of my body and spirit to take over and guide me.
I also noticed that I felt myself expanding and softening, feeling more loving and patient with my family, especially my husband and my son. I noticed when I did healing work for my clients (massage and Reiki both), I was present in a way that I haven't experienced in the 10 years I've been practicing. I felt more in tune with my clients and able to hold a bigger space. It felt amazing every time I would meet with someone.
Needless to say, this has been a profound month for me in terms of self-healing. I dug really deep and faced things that have been plaguing me for decades. I had plenty of opportunities to practice letting my ego take a backseat, and boy, did it feel WEIRD. Now that I find myself coming out of the healing crisis, I feel lighter, more clear, more expansive, more loving and more in alignment with my soul.
Until next time....
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